Joy to the World

Anne Frank said, “I can shake off everything as I write; my sorrows disappear, my courage is reborn.” Such wisdom indeed for a fourteen-year old girl, and how she captured the essence of writing. This is food for thought. Stop reading now if you’re put off by Christian beliefs :). If you keep a journal, part of the joy is looking back and seeing how much growth you’ve achieved as you recorded your sorrows and found your courage. Writing fiction isn’t that different. I look back at my earliest efforts to tell a story and think, “Wow.” Of course, I also think “Thank goodness no one published that!” It gives me hope because if I have grown a bit, I know I will grow some more and I look forward to it. It will be painful and I’ll groan and moan and love every minute of it. I find that writing is very cathartic. You put people in trouble—characters you grow to love—all the while knowing you can get them out again. You know just what is going to happen, what lessons they need to learn, and what growth they’re going to experience and then voila! Happy Ending. Okay, I'm writing a trilogy, so the reader might have to wait a while for the happy ending, but still…there will come a time when I will write, “And they lived happily ever after.” Whether it’s writing in my journal, or writing a novel, the process reminds me that there is One who is doing the same for us. He knows we’re going to get in trouble down here and He lets us. He knows we’re going to suffer sorrows and disappointment as we learn by our own experience. He knows how much we can take, what lessons we need to learn, and then exactly how to get us out of trouble--because He loves us. He especially knows all about the Happy Ending, because He made sure we would have one by suffering and dying for it. At this time of year, we celebrate the beginning; the little Savior born in a humble stable. We know it sets in motion the greatest story ever told. We know, thanks to those who lived and loved Him and told the story, of all He went through, not for His growth and learning, but so that we might have our Happy Ending. Joy to the World! Let’s remember, we can shake off all the sorrows, let our courage be reborn, as we contemplate the miracle of Christmas.

Just Five More Minutes...

When we were traveling with our small children—this was long before auto DVD players—and we’d played every car game known to humankind, we would hear endless questions about “how much longer ‘til we get there?” It did no good to say, “Just enjoy the journey. Sit back and relax.” Not to the restless, active kids WE had. So, our reply would be, “Just five more minutes.” Of course, eventually the kids figured out that we were just telling them that to hush them up, but it bought us about twenty more minutes of peace and quiet as they anticipated our arrival and before we got called out. “Hey, it’s been more than five minutes!” A little dishonest? Sure. Necessary for our sanity? Oh definitely. I think sometimes this is how the writing life is. Like restless small children we want to know, how much longer until we arrive? Telling someone who is pouring their heart and soul into their work to “Just sit back and relax and enjoy the journey,” doesn’t really help—not right then anyway. It didn’t for me, but I can, gratefully, say that I have enjoyed every part of this writing journey. I loved finding an idea. I loved interviewing the people who could give me the details that would make my fictional story seem authentic. I loved immersing myself in another world, very different from my own real one. I loved getting to know the people who became my main characters. Once I did, I knew what they would say and do and how the story would go which was fascinating. I enjoyed sending off my manuscript with high hopes. Screech to a stop…I did NOT enjoy the rejections! However, the criticism that went along with them was useful and eventually led to acceptance, so I could compare it to a blown head gasket. (Why yes, I am married to a mechanical man!) It took some time to absorb and move on, but I was on the road again eventually. So is being published arrival? Maybe. A lot of people think so. For me, it’s been wonderful, exciting, nerve-wracking—a huge learning experience. BUT, I know I have so much more to learn. I hope I have a better book in me to write. I know I will keep trying until my dying breath. For me, arrival will be when I know deep down in my heart that I have truly written something that will change someone’s life for the better—not just entertained them for a few hours. So, five more minutes—at a time-I'm on the road for the whole trip.

Taking It Up a Notch

I think it was a good thing I'd posted my "positive thinking" blog right before I went to the writer's conference and had a critique on my work-in-progress. The agent said some really good things about style and voice and characterization--right before she told me (in no uncertain terms) my plot basically wouldn't work! At first I was a bit put out but then I took my own advice and let it kick my b--- into high gear. Can I just say I LOVE what's happening in my story now? This is what an editor or agent does best. She gets a writer to take his/her writing to the next level. The agent, Jennifer Rofe from Andrea Brown Literary Agency, didn't give me any specific advice. It was more the authority and expertise she brought to the conference that let me know that if she said it wouldn't work, it really wouldn't work. Back to the drawing board! My friend with the crazy creative brain and I bounced ideas back and forth that night until we were both really excited about the whole new direction the plot would take. I spent the week after conference hashing out the details, at least up to a point. I really like to leave some open ends and see what the characters want to happen. As long as they know where they need to end up, I let them have some leeway: ) This might be a job at times--and it definitely is--but it sure is a job I love!

A Single Footstep

A friend gave me a quote a few weeks ago that I immediately put on my inspiration board. (This is a bulletin board with quotes, pictures, and memorabilia that will hopefully spark a visit from The Muse.) The quote says: “A single footstep will not make a path on earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kinds of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.” This is something I need to remember because it is true. Whenever I get into a negative frame of mind, and bombard myself with the idea that I am not a good enough writer then, naturally, I have writer’s block. Something snaps me out of that way of thinking and I realize…Of course I’m not—YET—but I’m just getting started! Then the ideas begin flowing and I feel ready to tackle this hard, wonderful job once more. I feel joy in writing—whether it’s pounding away on my work-in-progress or making up a story for my grandchildren. A fellow writer said to me the other day that she thought that one of the hardest things we have to learn is what to internalize and what to ignore. Rejection letters or criticism can be valuable if they’re meant constructively or even if they're not. They can demoralize us or challenge us. It’s up to us to decide. After taking a hard (calm) look at the situation, then we can decide how (or if) we can use it to improve. Making a positive path is my goal. Here’s how it looks in my imagination: It has lots of interesting bends and curves, is lined with big ol’ trees, and is floored with fragrant pine needles. Right now, the leaves are changing, some whirling down delightfully, catching my eye. It’s cool and misty, promoting a sense of intrigue. I’m ambling along, kicking those negative thoughts out of the way like so much litter and collecting the optimistic ones in my Sweetgrass basket! I’d love to hear from others. Favorite quotes about staying positive, ideas to spark creativity, whatever!

My Precious

I’m eagerly anticipating the release of the new Hobbit movie. The fact that there will be THREE movies only adds to the excitement, and if I could, I would sign up for the extended version films already. I was flipping through the book the other day, enjoying Michael Hague’s excellent illustrations, when I saw one titled “The Precious.” I’ve been thinking about that a bit since then. Don’t we all have something, a material item, which is so precious to us that we would get slightly hysterical, i.e. turn into a raving lunatic like Gollum, if it were taken from us? Yes, we do. Right now, my precious is my Kindle. Since I get a little (okay, a lot) antsy if I don’t have a book waiting for me to read next—this is not counting the one that I am currently reading—my Kindle has eased my troubled heart. A push of the button… and I can get a book. No long uphill half-mile journey to the library in all kinds of weather. (Yes, we moved to our house because of its proximity to the library—it’s all about location, people.) No browsing for hours to find the true and living NEXT GOOD READ. Many times, these days, I let my fingers do the walking, right into the e-book section of the lending library or on over to Amazon.com. That’s not to say that I don’t still have an on-going love affair with the crisp feel and smell of ink-laden pages, or simply love the anticipation of shelves of books stretching out in front of me in the library—that will never change. I resisted having a Kindle because of those very things. Bah humbug, I said. No electronic reading device could ever intrigue ME. I am now eating my words. But at least I haven’t succumbed to the I-phone craze yet. All those boorish people who jump to look at their phones as soon as it beeps while you’re in the midst of a conversation! So rude. No, when I get mine on October 5th, I will definitely NOT do that. So there.

Delayed Dreams

When I look back, I find it so interesting that I spent the years between fifteen and fifty not writing a word since I feel so restless these days when I’m not writing something. I didn’t even keep a decent journal during that time. As a child and a teenager, I wrote stories—mostly silly stories about girl crushes on rock stars—and then had my self-confidence, which was shaky at best, quenched by a critical creative writing class. In spite of being an avid reader, I ignored my love affair with books and words and became a nurse instead. Then a wife. Then a mother. Then a home-school teacher. Then a bookstore clerk. It wasn’t until I was fifty that I pulled a book off the shelf in that bookstore, a book about writing, and felt the first stirrings of the old passion. I had convinced myself long before that I couldn’t really write so it took a while for the dream to take hold. Now on the eve of having a book published (two and a half months, people!), I feel like it’s still a bit of a dream. My first book is not a great book. It’s not even a really, really good book, although I love the story and the characters the way a mother loves her children—wholeheartedly, in spite of all the faults. But it’s a start and the path stretches in front of me in such an inviting way. Wendell J. Berry said, “I am discomforted by the knowledge that I don’t know how to write the books that I have not yet written, but that discomfort has an excitement about it, and it is the necessary antecedent of one of the best kinds of happiness.” So completely true is this statement that I have it on my inspiration board by my desk. I can’t wait to discover the stories and meet the characters that wait just around the bend! I feel a little impatient to uncover the skills and talent that will help me tell those stories better—but being patient is the key there, and being willing to work hard. I can do that. I will do that! We had a funny quote on the refrigerator for a while (purchased by my husband) which said, “When Mama ain’t happy, nobody’s happy.” Now it should read, “When Mama ain’t writin’, nobody’s happy.” Lucky for me—and for my family—my writing refuge is only a few steps away. Please share any sage advice or inspirational stories with this newbie that you might care to!

Flopping out?

As the time gets closer for my book to be published, I am facing the fear of failure. There is a possibility that my book may flop. In spite of my friends’ and families’ affirmations—they love me, after all—it might not be all that good. My publisher believed and took a risk, but there are no guarantees. I spent some time thinking and worrying about this yesterday and came up with the following: It is okay. True, it will be hard to face the embarrassment. It will hurt and sting when I read the reviews and people have nothing good to say about something I poured my heart and soul into. But I’m tough and I can take that. What I can’t face is the possibility that I might never have tried. What would be really hard is not having had this experience, no matter how public the humiliation. Life is meant to be lived with our hearts wide open, not avoided, and I truly can say that the joys of this journey outweigh any future distress. Mahatma Gandhi said: “My imperfections and failures are as much a blessing from God as my successes and my talents and I lay both at his feet.” The only true failure in life for me would be not to know Who to turn to when things get rough. I mean really, when all is said and done, what matters most is if this experience is making me grow and learn to be a better person, not just a writer. And I hope it is! I’ll close with a more humorous quote, not only because it’s so true, but because I love to laugh. “Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic.”